Come to find out, all this talk about the UMC declining is simply a matter of how you look at the numbers. Sure we've lost millions of members over the past 40 years, but we've made up for it in personal growth.
According to a study conducted by Purdue University sociology professor Kenneth E. Ferraro, the UMC is now the fourth fattest denomination in America. Our brothers & sisters in the African Methodist Episcopal Church are right behind us in fifth place.
While no specific numbers are available, perhaps rather than being upset and worried about our numerical decline, we should be celebrating that our gross tonnage is on the upswing. However, even with this method of counting, we still find ourselves behind the Baptist, Catholics and even the Pentecostals.
The most obvious solution to this problem is more potlucks. We may not know how to evangelize, but we do know how to make a wicked casserole. And after all, aren't potlucks commanded in the Bible "Let us eat and drink, for tomorrow we die." (1 Corinithians 15:32)?